Forgiving Your Spouse and Moving Forward in Your Marriage
Most people struggle with forgiveness, especially if the person who hurt them is their spouse. Regardless of what your spouse has done or how badly you have been hurt, forgiveness is necessary if the relationship is to continue. It is much easier to say you forgive someone than it is to actually forgive them. Even so, in order to move forward and get your marriage back on track, forgiveness must truly take place.
Forgiveness is not approval of hurtful behavior
One of the main reasons that people struggle with forgiveness is they think by forgiving they are condoning the behavior they are forgiving. This is absolutely untrue. When you forgive your spouse you are not saying that you approve of whatever the behavior was that hurt you. You are simply acknowledging that they are human and make mistakes and that you can move past the mistake.
Holding onto hurt is unhealthy
By holding on to your hurt and refusing to forgive, you allow more hurt, anger and resentment to build. This only leads to more problems, so you can see why forgiveness is so important. Not offering forgiveness is unhealthy not only emotionally but also physically. Holding onto the anger builds the stress level in your body which can lead to all sorts of physical problems from simple stomach upsets to problems with blood pressure.
Forgiveness offers your marriage another chance
The first step to forgiveness is telling your spouse exactly how their actions made you feel. It is also important that you let your spouse know, that the behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated again. Remember forgiveness does not mean approval. If your spouse is truly repentant, forgiveness will allow the two of you to redefine your relationship and move forward toward trust again.
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